Change.

That topic on change will always be something new or something similar.

Now what changes were there in 2016? Well, being married, having to tune into different thoughts n considerations.

Arent my big aunt right when she told me about how problem stays as a problem no matter how far I go away in distance, or maybe get married away?

Because right now, I really really do hate it still. That I couldnt come to peace with my own past. And this is making me feel so terrible n horrible even when I dont want to feel it. It isnt really a past to deal with, but more like reality. Because i've never had any solutions to this family thingy. Well so called "family". I just cant n dont wanna call it my "family". Who could really understand this? The way I felt? Being someone elses step child. Having to be a step sister, but act like a sister. Act.

Well the only thing I can happily accept is my father being my father.

Sometimes I feel sad that I could tell this to anyone. Because how would anyone really understand? That the truth is that I cant accept. And what pple might wan, is just for me to act like its all just "family" n nothing separated in my heart.